Everyone Has Secrets
by shinigami-lives
Summary: ...Yep, they do, and when one of Kenshin's secrets results in a sudden increase in weight and early morning vomiting, this exposes even more of his secrets to his bewildered friends. Inspired by bunny by Cheysuli. yaoi, MPREG
1. Chapter 1

_Author's Note: Trust me, if I owned this series, there would be no Kaoru/Kenshin ever. Thus we prove that I do not own it._

Chapter One:

The fifth morning that Kaoru was awoken by the noise of Kenshin being quietly sick, she ignored his protests that 'this one is just fine, de gozaru' and sent Sano to get Megumi. As much as she did not like the vixen being too near Kenshin, she knew full well that Megumi was an excellent doctor, also being more in the confidences of Kenshin's past than the Doctor she was in service of. She would have sent Yahiko, but somebody had to do the chores that Kenshin was unable to complete.

When Megumi did arrive, Kenshin was somewhat recovered, but was still pallid and his face was streaked with sweat. With great difficulty, and much aided by several whacks on Kenshin's head with Kaoru's bokken, Megumi managed to get Kenshin to lie down and began to examine him. So thorough was her examination that if Kenshin hadn't still been too weak to be able to sit up, then Kaoru would have been considerably more upset about the whole affair.

For the longest time, it seemed that, other than the obvious physical symptoms, Megumi could not actually find anything physically wrong with the rurouni. Then, ignoring Kaoru's squeaks of protest, she removed Kenshin's gi, and lay her head to his stomach, appearing to be listening intently.

After a couple of minutes of intently listening to Kenshin's midriff, and equally intensely ignoring the sounds of protest that Kaoru was still making, Megumi sat up and stared at the now far more recovered Kenshin in great shock. Having waited patiently in this state for twenty-five whole seconds, Yahiko demanded,

"Well, what's wrong with Kenshin?"

Megumi was still silent, staring in shock at Kenshin, who merely sighed and nodded,

"You may tell them, Megumi-dono, this one does not mind."

Megumi blinked and then managed to find her voice.

"Ken-san appears to be…pregnant."

For approximately fifty-eight seconds, everyone, except Kenshin himself, stared at Megumi in utter shocked silence. Then, tragically for those listening, Kaoru found her voice again.

"WHAT?"

Megumi shrugged her shoulders slightly,

"It doesn't make sense, but all the symptoms match and the second heartbeat was ultimately what gave it away."

Kenshin sighed and started adjusting his gi over himself, refusing to meet anyone's eyes. Then Megumi seemed to realise that Kenshin was not having the nervous breakdown that she would expect of a man who had gotten pregnant, or, even failing that, the nervous breakdown of an unmarried woman who had gotten pregnant. Turning on him, she asked,

"You don't seem surprised."

Kenshin shrugged and still did not answer, then Sano regained the use of his voice, another tragedy for those with sensitive hearing and commented,

"Yeah, Kenshin. If it'd been me, I would have freaked."

Everyone was staring at the former rurouni, even Yahiko, who seemed to have just worked out the whole 'Kenshin is a man who is pregnant' problem. Eventually the swordsman sighed and said,

"I've been pregnant before."

The others were so stunned by this calm yet oddly subdued statement that they did not even notice Kenshin's use of 'I' in contrast to his usual self-effacing mode of address. Finally, and tragically, Kaoru managed to speak,

"What? Why didn't you tell us you had kids?"

Kenshin flinched, his eyes sad,

"I don't. I…had a miscarriage."

Megumi spoke then, but in her guise of the doctor, not the overly curious and utterly stunned friend. The doctor side of her was stunned as well, but was hiding it better for the sake of her patient.

"Oh, I'm sorry. Do you know what caused the miscarriage? I need to know what to look out for."

Kenshin looked down for a long moment, and when he looked up, his eyes were burning amber, cold and chilling and more like the hitokiri battousai than any of them were comfortable with.

"My lover kicked me in the stomach. I killed him for that."

The look in Kenshin's eyes had no forgiveness and seemed to suggest that Kenshin wanted to kill that nameless lover again and again. Eventually, Sano managed to work up the courage to ask the question that was on all their minds,

"Kenshin, I'm no genius-" "Big surprise" Megumi muttered quietly and Sano scowled at her before continuing as if she had never spoken. "But even I know that men don't usually get, well, pregnant."

Kenshin sighed and the burning amber receded from his gaze to leave the usual melancholy amethyst tint.

"It is an uncommon trait."

Megumi looked even more interested now, her natural curiosity being magnified by her interest in this medical anomaly that was a pregnant man. Kenshin noticed her curiosity and sighed,

"It is not something that this one can explain, that it is not."

Seemingly reassured by Kenshin's return to his traditional speech patterns, the deviation from which hadn't even been noticed until it ended, Megumi asked,

"You can't explain because you don't know or because you don't want to tell us?"

Kenshin frowned slightly at the doctor, who found herself flushing under his firm gaze.

"This one cannot explain because sessha was never told in a way that made any sense to an adult. The only explanation this one could give was given to this one as a child, on the presumption that when sessha was older this one would receive a more full explanation."

Kaoru frowned,

"Why were you not told?"

Kenshin shrugged,

"The only ones who could have explained it to this one died, that they did."

Yahiko seemed curious at this,

"Who were they?"

Kenshin's gaze was utterly blank,

"My parents."

None of the Kenshin-gumi could think of anything to say to this and they sat in silence, an odd occurrence indeed, until Kenshin started to get up and looked to be leaving. Then Kaoru blurted out,

"Where are you going?"

In the process of picking up his sakabatou, Kenshin turned to looked at her with an impenetrable expression on his face,

"I am going to my lover, that I am. He deserves to know that he is to be a father."

All the others in the room blinked in an almost synchronised manner. Then Sano muttered,

"He?"

Kenshin smiled slightly,

"Yes, he. A woman most certainly could not make me pregnant, that she could not."

Kaoru stared at Kenshin and asked,

"Who is he?"

Kenshin smiled at her,

"My lover? That is between him and I, that it is."

And with those words, Kenshin slipped on his sandals and out of the dojo, leaving a group of very shell-shocked friends behind him.

TBC

_Please review, all comments and **constructive** criticism welcome._

_Hmmm, guesses as to who you think Kenshin's lover is would also amusing/appreciated._

_This story was inspired by a plot bunny created by the magnificent Cheysuli Night._


	2. Chapter 2

AN: Would you believe that I still don't own Kenshin…yeah, me neither.

Chapter Two

Detchiri Gesu was very happy with his job in the police force in Tokyo. It was, as far as he was concerned, the perfect job to have. The job security was excellent, the wages were good, the uniform was free, and most importantly, Gesu had found a way for his job to be perfectly safe. He had worked out very early on that as long as he left the yakuza alone and turned a blind eye, for a price of course, then his job was really very easy.

Not to mention that working for the police got him out of all sorts of messy business such as fighting in wars, where he might get killed. He had always known that he had had all the common sense in the family, much more than his older brother, who had always said that he would never amount to anything and then had been fool enough to go off and get himself killed fighting for the revolution.

His older brother had never realised the crucial fact that Gesu had understood early on in life, that the messy business such as fighting in wars was best left to those foolish enough to only be suited for such things. Sensible individuals, such as Gesu himself, left others to do the fighting and dying and then stepped in afterwards to reap the benefits. Gesu cared nothing for politics except for how they could benefit him; he had been a willing supporter of the Bakufu Shogunate, and would have willingly welcomed their victory had that been the result of the Bakumatsu. To put it simply, Detchiri Gesu was an opportunist of the highest degree.

So yes, Gesu was very happy with his job in the Tokyo police force, particularly now that that idiotic sword corps had been disbanded; honestly, people thinking that having actually fought in the revolution gave them rights over others, what kind of idiocy was that? Or at least, Detchiri Gesu would have been very happy with his job, if it weren't for certain individuals, who seemed to have been put on the earth for the sole purpose of making Gesu's life more difficult.

Most of these supremely aggravating individuals, Gesu had had to learn to turn a blind eye on, especially those especially annoying inhabitants of the Kamiya Dojo. That redhead in particular… the redhead was definitely the worst, deliberately flouting the sword laws in the Meiji era…didn't the fool know that swords were now merely a useless relic of a time passed, and all the better that it was gone, as far as Gesu was concerned.

The redhead was definitely the root of the problem, as he seemed to have some obscure connection with the government, connection at an extremely high level. Any request for any kind of investigation into that man's activities was met with short shrift and the instructions, no matter how they were worded, to keep his nose out of business that didn't concern him. This incomprehensible protection was extended to the redhead's friends, but there was no doubt that he himself was the individual that the government was truly concerned with.

So thus, Gesu had to turn a blind eye on the activities of those individuals, but there was one certain character that Gesu was unable to ignore, and whose activities grated the most on his common sense. That person was unfortunately enough, Gesu's boss, the utterly mystifying Fujita Goro. The man had seemingly transferred himself from Kyoto for no particular reason and showed no signs of ever leaving, particularly due to the connection he seemed to have with certain individuals, in particular that redhead.

Worst of all, Goro was that thing that Gesu despised above all others, a cop who seemed determined to interfere with and impede the actions of the Yakuza, the man just didn't seem to understand that that was not their place as police officers. Furthermore, the man carried a sword and seemed obsessed with eradicating evil, while any sensible individual realised that such a concept was entirely anachronistic. Not to mention the man had an inexplicable addiction to soba noodles and some obscure link with the government.

But the thing about Goro that Gesu hated the most was that as long as he was around, that redhead made regular visits to the police headquarters, for no other seeming reason than to sit with the man for hours, drinking tea – and occasionally causing large amounts of property damage, which was always ignored by all quarters.

And that was Gesu's problem today as well; the redhead had appeared as he always did, utterly silently and seemingly out of nowhere, though how someone with hair that colour could appear out of nowhere escaped Gesu's comprehension entirely. The arrival of the redhead meant that Gesu had to do that thing that he hated the most, talk to Goro. Thus he reluctantly found himself knocking on the door of that man's office.

"What is it?" An annoyed voice drawled out from within the office, Gesu frowned but called back; he had learned it was best to avoid entering that man's office if he could possibly avoid it

"Himura-san is here to talk with you, Fujita-san."

He heard the familiar thonk that he had learned to understand to be the sound of Goro's boots dropping from his desk to the floor.

"Send him in then, ahou."

Gesu repressed his growl at that address and went back to where the redhead waited.

"Fujita-san will see you now."

The redhead smiled distractedly at him and Gesu attempted to repress the shiver than ran through him at that smile, it was quite possibly the most terrifying thing he had ever seen. As the redhead walked calmly towards Goro's office, he Gesu turned his attention back to his paperwork, he truly hated that man.

Saito smiled as he heard Himura's familiar, almost silent footsteps approaching his door, it had been some time since he had seen the younger man and even destroying yakuza and terrifying his subordinates couldn't make up for the pleasure of Kenshin's company; not to mention that the redhead was the only person worth fighting with.

As the slender young man slipped into his office, Saito was unable to restrain the possessive impulse to reassert his claim on the younger swordsman. He found himself pressing Kenshin against the wall of his office, ravaging the molten confines of his mouth and letting his hands trace up beneath the magenta gi. But the instincts which were all that remained of his former psychic abilities told him that something was…if not wrong then different. Pulling back slightly, he let his fingers trace patterns through tousled red locks as he asked,

"What's wrong?"

Kenshin flushed, and Saito was unable to restrain the urge to press another kiss against those parted and slightly swollen lips that he had just parted company with. Saito was almost entirely certain that the former hitokiri had no idea just how alluring he looked. But that ineffable sense of wrongness remained. Pulling back reluctantly, Saito fixed Kenshin with his best glare and stood, waiting for his answer. Eventually, Kenshin spoke,

"I…that this, it is not easy for this one to explain."

Saito scowled, both at the answer, and at Kenshin having slipped back into the self-deprecating speech patterns that Saito abhorred. Slowly, and obviously reluctantly, Kenshin began to speak again,

"Have I ever told you about my childhood?"

Saito frowned at this seeming non-sequitur, but answered nevertheless,

"I've met that lunatic you call shishou, Battousai."

Kenshin flinched at the name, and Saito regretted having said it, the former Hitokiri was obviously in no mood to be goaded into anger in order to become communicative. But, despite this, Kenshin continued speaking,

"I'm not talking about shishou. But I need to tell you about who I was before."

Saito's brow furrowed in interest. He knew the basic details of Kenshin's past, that his parents had died when he was young and he had been taken by slave traders, after which he had come into the 'care' of Seijuro Hiko. But before that, his past was as much a mystery as it was to his so-called friends. Seeing his obvious interest, Kenshin continued,

"My parents died, along with my whole village, just after I turned seven. It was tuberculosis."

Saito managed to restrain a flinch – the mention of that disease always brought back melancholy measure of Okita that he would rather remain buried.

"But, before they died, my mother told me a legend that had long been told in our community. The legend was that those children born with hair like mine, and eyes that change – that those children were born with the gift of life."

Kenshin paused and let out a sound that, had it come from anyone but him, would have been unmistakably a snort,

"For a long time, I thought it was nothing but foolish fancy. Life is the last thing I've ever brought. But I was young when I was told the legend, and it wasn't until it was proven true that I really understood."

Saito said nothing, but his eyes gestured for Kenshin to continue. Sighing, the younger man spoke once more,

"My _gift_ – the reason battousai exists – to compensate for my gift. My gift is life. Or to put it simply – I'm pregnant, it's yours."

**TBC.**

_Sorry, a) about the delay and b) for the shortness of this update, but I'm in the middle of applying to Oxford, and busy doesn't even begin to cover it. Basically, if I do any updates between now and Christmas, they will be short. Sorry about this, but it really can't be helped._

_**NOTES:**_

_**Detchiri – means protruding butt**_

_**Gesu – means ugly/low class**_

_**You might guess from the above name translations that I do not like this character. That is because I do not. I made him up as an OC simply so that I could mock him, and present an alternate view of the characters involved. He has no role in the story other than to sit back and take my abuse.**_


	3. Chapter 3

AN: Sorry this has taken so long and is so short, but this is the only way I can get any time to update.

Chapter Three

"…Oi, I wonder where Kenshin's gone."

It had been an hour since the ex-hitokiri had slipped silently from the dojo and the people he had left behind had remained in much the same shocked stupor that they had been in when he had left. It had taken them this long for Yahiko to realise to ask this crucial question. Sano made a face,

"It's obvious, he said he's going to talk to well…the other father."

Yahiko scowled,

"That doesn't help; it's not like we know who the other father even is."

Sano frowned,

"Eh, that's a good question, 'specially from a gaki like yourself."

There was a pause then Sano spoke again,

"Why are you all staring at me?"

Another pause and Sano flushed scarlet,

"Me, and Kenshin? Have you all completely lost your minds?"

Kaoru blushed crimson and, as she was unable to speak from all the blood rushing to her face, Megumi spoke for her,

"Well, who else would it be?"

There was another moment's silence and Megumi continued,

"You're the only obvious choice, every other guy we know has tried to kill Kenni first."

Previously, they would have thought it was impossible for Sano to blush a darker shade of red, but he proved them all wrong in that moment and mumbled something under his breath.

"What was that?"

Sano glared at Megumi and repeated his comment, annunciating clearly,

"I said that When I First Met Kenshin I Was Trying To Kill Him."

Yahiko snickered quietly,

"Yeah, he got his ass kicked"

Sano growled,

"Shut up, gaki, it's not like you could last two seconds against Kenshin, besides I'm loads better now."

Undeterred by Sano's obvious ire, Yahiko stuck his tongue out,

"Kenshin could still beat you with his eyes closed and one hand tied behind his back."

Megumi held Sano back as he leapt forward to try and strangle Yahiko, who Kaoru was beating over the head with her bokken – it wasn't that she disagreed with him, but the gaki had to learn to be less arrogant.

When a reasonable degree of sanity had returned, or at least as little as there had ever been, Megumi let go of a still grumbling Sano and Kaoru left Yahiko sitting on the floor, rubbing at the rather prominent lump on his head. The two young women ignored their scowling companions and returned their attention to their previous topic of conversation.

"So if Sano isn't the other father," (at this the former street thug in question nodded vigorously) "then who is?"

The room at large considered the question until Kaoru spoke up hesitantly,

"What about Aoshi-san?"

There was a moment of silence as the others considered this (and as Kaoru and Megumi turned matching shades of pink at the visuals – or at least, Kaoru turned pink and Megumi grinned salaciously). They found that the idea was not as shocking as they would have thought it might have been, nor as impossible to imagine actually happening. Then, Sano spoke, inserting a little bit of reality into Megumi and Kaoru's rabid fangirl-ism.

"There's not a chance – Misao would cut his balls off."

Yahiko cringed sympathetically, both at the imagery and at the thought of what he thought Kaoru would do to Sano for speaking thus. He then found himself frowning in disappointment when both girls burst out laughing. After a moment, Megumi managed to get her laughter under control enough to ask Sano another question,

"She definitely would – but the question is, whose would she cut off?"

Sano rolled his eyes as he considered this, then he answered,

"I don't know, probably Kenshin, for daring to defile her precious Aoshi-sama, but maybe she'd take both pairs, Kenshin's and Shinomori's."

This set the two girls off again, and Yahiko and Sano had a strange moment of unity as their exchanged the immortal look of commiseration shared between men when surrounded by giggling women.

Finally the two girls managed to gain sufficient control of themselves, though their cheeks remained flushed and their eyes glittered mischievously enough to make any man in the vicinity uncomfortable.

There was another moment of silent consideration before Megumi spoke again,

"So, if it isn't Sano _or _Aoshi-san, who is it?"

Yahiko spoke up again,

"What about that teacher of his Hiko something?"

The two girls frowned for a moment, but then Kaoru whacked him over the head with her bokken,

"Don't be a baka, he's over ten years older than Kenshin – plus he's got to be twice his size."

Sano had recovered enough of his sanity to speak coherently, but not enough to have regained what little self-preservation instinct he had,

"Eh, maybe Kenshin's big enough where it counts."

Before Kaoru could beat on Sano for speaking in such a way, Megumi also spoke up,

"I don't think that's the consideration here – from the fact that he's the one pregnant, I'd say Kenshin was more on the receiving than giving end in these circumstances."

Kaoru did not think it was possible for her to blush any darker shade than she already was, but life constantly proved her wrong and this area was no different. Then Yahiko spoke and she collapsed again into the hysterical giggles that had been threatening all morning,

"Oi, what are you lot talking about?"

It took a good five minutes for them to recover from that laughing fit, and probably would have taken longer if Yahiko hadn't been on his feet; scowling in what he probably thought was a fierce manner and kicking at shins indiscriminately.

Still laughing, she sat back up, some of her nerves about the entire situation dissipated. The Megumi spoke again,

"So if it's not any of them, and we assume it's not one of Shishio's men or someone obviously an enemy, then the only person it can be is Saito-san."

Kaoru gaped at the woman,

"You must be joking, Kenshin and that cop, there's no way…"

Sano seemed equally incensed by the suggestion,

"Kenshin and that government dog, there's no chance in hell…I'd sooner believe that Shishio was back from the dead and that he, Kenshin and Jin-E were in a threesome."

Kaoru made a face at that particular image, but despite her instinctive rejection of the idea, she had to admit that Megumi's suggestion had more likelihood than her gut reaction would suggest. Although she might not like it herself, Kenshin had more shared history and memories in common with the Miburou than he did with anyone else and the two of them understood things about each other that no one else ever could.

In a way, they were two relics of a past age; sword-wielding warriors in a time that no longer openly admitted that it had any use for the sword, although it was more than willing to use it and the men who wielded them when the time came when they were needed. They shared memories that Kaoru herself would never be able to stand against; memories of Kyoto when the sky rained blood and it was easier to trust an enemy than a friend because you knew at least that he was not planning to stab you in the back but would instead attack you to your face.

But still, Saito and Kenshin, there was no way, was there?

TBC.

_I'm sorry for the shortness of this update, but life is a bitch that has just had puppies._

_I know a lot of you wanted to see Saito's reaction, but I really wanted to write this chapter and this was the best place for it to go. Do not fear, Saito and Kenshin will return next chapter, when I have time to write it._


End file.
